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Saturday, May 16, 2009

Quick recap of the night

Last night was fun...drank a bottle of wine to myself. Left the house drunk as a skunk. Went to the bar...drunk some more (for free)...went to another spot...partied a bit...drank some more (for free)...saw an old "flame" <---notice the quotes...he steady flapping his gums about how we should hook up again.

HAHA nigga....negatory on that.

Took my mom out for lunch today...see a guy on a motorcycle. He has LONG dreds. Like he's damn near sitting on them. THIS woman I call my mother says, super loud:

"FAG!" -Her

"Ma...what was that for?" -Me

"All that hair...he's a fag." -Her

More "Momisms" from the day:

"I want a motorcycle..." -Me

"Anything else you wanna tell me?" -Her

"Huh? What you mean?" -Me

"I mean...you like to shoot guns and ride motorcycles...next you're gonna tell me you like pussy!" -Her

"I said it once, I'll say it twice, your baby daddy is a BITCH ASS BITCH!"

After seeing an old woman with a gang of chin hair....

"OH...MY...GOD! Looks like chewbacca and a wooly mammoth had a baby!"

That woman is crazy...

5 comments:

NINA said...

I NEED TO HANG OUT WITH YOUR MOMS ASAP HAHA

dearly beloved. said...

i love yo momma!

she reminds me of my moms.. always got something to say and the shit is always pure comedy.

Epitome said...

I can't take her nor my son in public...they have no barrier. Just say whatever the hell they feel like saying. Yall don't wanna kick it with that lady...she's crazy

Bella said...

hahahaha! i havent been here in a while (damn twitter) ur mom is funny as hell lmao

.× azzy. ♥♥ said...

i don't know ur mom but i love her! hahaha!!! her and my aunt could get along perfectly...maybe???