What He Wants vs. What She Wants

I predict 2010 will be the year of the relationship for my friends...and I. Not because I'm looking for one (nor are they) it just seems like the foundation was being laid in 2009 and this year it will be coming to fruition...I could be wrong...but I don't think I am. We'll see how it goes.

Anyway, I was watching The Notebook for the first time on Wednesday (I think) and I watched all the romance taking place and given my predicition for this year I had an idea for a blog...and here we are.

We'll start with what he wants...it's simple...he wants sex. Men and women get in relationships and the sex falls off (ask a married man if he's getting as much coo coo as he was when he was dating and see what his answer is)...I guess we women feel "well I got him now"....no bitch, you cannot take that approach.

Thou must slang thy coo coo to thy man!

So...I'm gonna take a minute to give you some ideas to make your man and his soldier smile.

• The Treasure Hunt: Let me set the scene for you. Your man shoots you an email/text/call about how he had a rough day at work. Take this opportunity to show him you're sorry about his day. Get some candels, light a path from the door up to wherever you'd like for your man to find his surprise. Along the way insert some sexy pictures of yourself (if you still have a polaroid..yes I do for a situation such as this) or if you have a photo printer (yes I do for a situation such as this). Lead him in a maze (don't just lead from the door to the bedroom). Have him stop at the fridge for a drink then lead him to his destination. When he gets to the bedroom/the couch/wherever give him a massage and suck his dick...don't necessarily expect for him to fuck you (though he probably will) make sure he realizes, this is about him and his needs.
• Pictures: I've told you before on my blog...men are VISUAL...send him pictures via text/bbm in the middle of the day while you're at work, he'll think about you all day. Get up and leave before he does and tape a sexy picture of yourself to the bathroom mirror. Leave a sexy picture in his car...or his briefcase.
• Role Play: Put a wig and contacts on, dress differently than you normally do...show up to a club/bar/restaurant you know he'll be at...bump into him and act as if you've just met. Give him a fake name and be more overtly sexual than you usually are...grab his dick in public, lick his ear lobe...have a hotel room already set up, tell him you want to take him there and fuck his brains out...and do it. Fuck him like you never have before. Then when he's asleep, leave. Call him before checkout (as your usual self) and act as if you have no idea what he did last night. Example: "Hey babe, good morning, wanted to see if you wanted to grab lunch today? How was your night?" It's like cheating...without actually doing it. You can also tie this into the pictures, ever so often you can put on the alter ego get up and leave pictures for him in his car or wherever with a note on the back "I wanna suck your dick...call me."
• Porno: Buy it for him...AND WATCH IT WITH HIM. This would also be something good to include on the treasure hunt.
• Sex Toys: This is a two-fer gift...like men buy women lingerie...it's really for them...this is the same concept, gifts that are for him that you both can enjoy. Get toys he can use on you, and vice versa...fun toys like sex dice, sex coupons, etc.
• Suck his dick: Suck it just cause...not cause he asked, not because it's your anniversary, suck it cause it's tuesday! Ladies who don't like to wake up with your man head between your legs? MEN LIKE THAT TOO! And don't always let sucking his dick lead to fucking...just please him. On a Saturday morning wake him up by sucking his dick, when he finishes, turn on the shower for him and go cook breakfast...and then BOUNCE. Go out with the girls or if you don't live together, go home.

Now...onto what she wants...ROMANCE, men it's very simple to be romantic...take what you would want from her...and remove the sex portion. For instance...take the treasure hunt game and instead of eating her out...just massage her back, instead of sexy photos...leave a poem or write something that you like about her, example: "I love the way your nose crinkles when you laugh"...something like that.

• Love notes/poems: We LOVE shit like that, you don't necessarily have to write us a poem or a love note, you can google it, as long as it relates to how you feel about us. You DO get extra credit if you write it though...no matter how bad it sounds to you, we'll love it. Not a poet? http://www.rhymezone.com/ is all you need. Not a writer? Start here: http://www.links2love.com/love_letters.htm you can take pieces from letters found here or just copy and paste. And POW! You got your woman coo coo looking like a rainforest
• Hotel rooms: Tell her you want her to meet you somewhere...preferably near a nice hotel...key word NICE...not just a regular ole run of the mill hotel but a niiiiiiice one. Order room service (or if you're real suave...pack a picnic of her favorite food) and spend a night in the room boo loving. Watch movies, laugh, talk, play games, etc...don't make sex an issue, more than likely she'll be aching to give it to you anyway before you go to bed.
• Breakfast in bed: One time when I was in college this guy I was seeing (who lived on the 9th floor of my dorm...I lived on the 18th) knocked on my room door early one Saturday morning with a plate of cinnamon rolls..."I made you breakfast...there's enough for you and your roommate" he said, kissed me on my cheek and left. Needless to say me and my roommate squealed once I was sure he was on the elevator. DO THAT! Especially if you don't live together. Make (or buy if you can't cook) her breakfast and drive to her house to deliver it to her...the choice to leave is up to you, I say leave, she'll probably stop you though.
• Pretty Woman: This relates to the treasure hunt sorta...wake her early one day and tell her you have a day of relaxation planned for her, send her to the spa, have her set up for a massage, manicure, and pedicure. Set someone up to come to her house and do her makeup and hair (not as expensive as you might be thinking it is) have a new outfit waiting for her in the closet. After she's snazzy have a car come pick her up and take her to a nice restaurant where you'll be waiting...you can also tie the hotel room into this scenario.
• Trips: Women love to travel, even if your woman doesn't, she'll value spending time with you. You don't have to go far either...nearly everywhere has a winery within a few hours distance. Take a drive, have lunch/dinner and talk.

All in all you can really take anything and make it romantic for a woman...the key is actually doing something. That takes thought and time and women will remember that more than the 30 minutes to an hour you spent fucking her...trust me.

I hope you all have learned a thing or two...now...go forth and be great!